Yesterday was the third-year graduation ceremony at our school, so I had to get all dressed up in a full suit and tie and try and look professional. The ceremony was pretty bizarre, which was to be expected, but the sheer difference between what happens here and back home was a bit of an eye opener.

To start with, there was lots and lots of standing up and sitting down. There were three groups present; teachers, students and parents which allowed for quite a nice mix of possibilities when it came to standing up. For example, teachers and students, just students, just teachers and parents and the special bonus move, everybody at once. It was kind of like musical chairs in a language I didn’t understand, with a prize of ritual humiliation in front of a thousand people if I stood up at the wrong time. Let me assure you, this was definately a ceremony that kept you on your toes.

To make matters even more confusing, there were plenty of bows thrown in there for good measure. I felt like a yo yo by the time the ceremony was over. I think the principal went up and down from the stage about 10 times during the hour-long ceremony, bowing three times in the general direction of the stage each time. When the Japanese go for official, they certainly go all out.

After to ceremony, each class stood up one at a time and a representative said thank you to their homeroom teacher, or rather, they tried to amidst the sobbing from the rest of the class. It was surreal, kids unhappy about the fact they’d just finished school? Certainly not something you’d see in Aus.

The other big “highlight” was the luxury bento, a lunch box filled will all manner of bizarre goodies of which I could identify maybe two or three (Tempura fried shrimp, a tomato and pasta salad, the rest was a mystery). I have to say though, on the whole it was pretty good – although some of the tastes were downright weird. Japanese food in Japan is so utterly different from Japanese food anywhere else. I’m convinced they just export the good stuff.

Oh, and my third year class brought me a flower that they’d all written on, which was really sweet although the messages they left were, well, a little bizarre. Here’s a sample:

Hi DAN! Now is a my generation. Take a look around! Bye Bye!

Hey boy! I am lucky boy. Because I met DAN. THANKS!

I am Naoki. I never forget your face and body! Never give up?

I want to meet you soon. Do you remember me? I love you! Eat you arrive!

Uhhhhh, yeah. Great to see they’re flexing their basically limitless vocabulary and applying it in new and creative ways. Eat me arrive? What the fuck? I’m going to miss the little bastards though, they were an awesome class.

Posted in Japan on Sunday February 29, 2004.

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